Go for the gusto

Last week I attended the funeral of my friend’s father who was 96.  Yes, he’d had a good innings and he’d truly made the most of them.

While he had to retire at 65, he chose to keep working, taking contracts and so forth until he was 80.  He lived independently until he was 93, and only then, when his health was failing, did he move into a retirement complex.

He was one feisty old boy.  I first met Lloyd when he was around 80.  Always game to try something new, he insisted on coming along with his daughter and her husband to our annual Burns Party, so he could sample some haggis first hand.  He became a regular after that, and even though he was at least 30 years older than the rest of our guests, everyone loved to see him there.  He was interested, and interesting. 

Always up for a new adventure, in his later years, he bought a large boat which required a lot of work, and for which he had to get his mariner’s license… needless to say … he did. But you know what, he couldn’t swim, but he didn’t let that small fact get in the way.

I share his story because I wish we could all take a dose of Lloyd’s energy and enthusiasm for life.   When we live life with gusto, not much gets you down.  Oh sure there will be some mistakes and mishaps along the way, but when we act as if tomorrow may never come, we live our lives to the fullest.

And even with the kinks on the journey, when you have the right attitude, you can overcome and jump  over these hurdles.  It makes me think of a tree we have growing on our property.  For some reason it is all twisted and curled up, which you think would kill it, but no, the leaves are still there, it is still growing.  That’s what we need to do.

Acknowledge the curveballs, perhaps make some adjustments, but carry on.  Don't give up.

What are we waiting for?

Last week at my friend’s funeral, friends and family spoke of her determination, her courage and her love of life. As her husband shared, in the four years since she’d been diagnosed with breast cancer, she’d been crazily optimistic and packed a lot of life into those four years – learning to ride a motor bike and getting her license, taking up golf, participating in the 60K walk to end breast cancer twice, succeeding in a high powered job with a major corporation. No, nothing was going to stop Val from living the life she wanted.

It does make you wonder what you would do if you were given the same prognosis – would you work as hard? Would you try to spend more quality time with family and friends? Or would you, like Val continue to learn and grow, perhaps travel to broaden your horizons?

What holds us back from doing all this in good health? Why do we have to wait until it is almost too late to achieve our dreams?

In a recent article, life coach Gail Blanke asks a similar question – what are you waiting for? She observes that we tend to put our power on hold until we get a signal or an invitation that this is THE right time to change our lives, that all the stars are aligned to make it work. It is almost as if our fear of failure holds us back.

She tells a poignant story of a young woman who aspired to be an intern with a famous opera maestro and she had written to him to explore this possibility. She got a letter back but her fear of rejection held her back and she never opened it. It sat unopened for years until his death, and only then did she discover that he had been willing to take her as his intern. What a missed opportunity. After that, she vowed she would never shortchange or sabotage herself again. She encourages other women to recognize their self-worth - “Don’t be a smart girl with dumb fear. Fear is nothing more less than False Evidence Appearing Real” she tells others.

How do you embrace your power asks Blanke. She encourages us to add up the times we’ve showed up big, not the times we’ve messed up. What’s your big dream? What’s holding you back? As Blanke asks – what are you waiting for? Go for it.