Thursday, September 01, 2011

Getting Past Myself

This week I met with book coach Sabaina Malik to talk about how to literally get the word out about my new book – Day by Day - Tales of Business, Life and Everything In Between.

As she talked about what I could do to create a buzz about the book, I realized that what was holding me back, was me. “You’re too modest, Anne.” she observed. Like many women, I am uncomfortable about selling myself and given that the book is about my life and the lessons I have learned – it really is all about me.

Why do we do that? I’ve had a very successful career, have accomplished a lot and I believe I have made a difference in the lives of others; so it’s not that I lack confidence in myself, yet I still hold back from tooting my own horn. Maybe it is my British background, because growing up in the UK, it would be deemed highly inappropriate to brag about yourself.

Maybe we need to follow the example of our southern sisters because they don’t seem to have the same difficulty in selling themselves. But there is a fine line between being confident and being in someone’s face.

Or maybe I just need to take my own advice because in the book I talk about slaying dragons and facing fears head-on. My fears there concerned driving into the unknown, especially on highways and public speaking – and I am getting better on both fronts.

But I sometimes wonder if my fear in this instance is the fear of failing, that people won’t like my book, and because of its content, by extension won’t like me. There I said it. As Jane Fonda said the other night, the disease of pleasing. I know better and I need to get over myself.

“But the other challenge,” Sabaina remarked, “is that people see you as the founder of Company of Women, not as an author.” So she recommended that I first start to identify myself as a writer because if I don’t believe it myself, how can I expect other people to.

My homework is to write my bio as an author, which given this is my third book, shouldn’t be a stretch, I just have to remember I can write.

So let me start by introducing you to Anne Day, author – OK Sabaina - accomplished author.

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